A Productive Notion

Today I am, perhaps, stupidly eager to be productive. Every second of my life I worry if I’m using it effectively. Is this normal? What is normal? Do we want to be normal? I’m pretty sure normality isn’t what I crave, for I’m forever attempting to stand out. I want to make myself known. Blending into the background is something I’ve continuously avoided. My stomach feels empty. Forget those moments of insecurity. We’re often all phased with the fear that if we don’t ‘fit in’ then we will be persecuted. I have had my fair share of persecution for this very reason. However, I still aim to continue in my bid to become something more than them. Something with substance. I don’t want to be ’normal’, for normal is just a setting on the washing machine. That reminds me of a productive thing I must do with my precious hours today; put the washing on. Oh, the joys of life in it’s entirety. I will write a ‘to do’ list. How I revel in the feeling I gain from ticking each bullet point off as I accomplish my daily duties. I mustn’t waste a moment. Life is ever so precious. If I want achieve my goals I mustn’t hesitate. I must ignite my belief in something more. In who I am. In belief itself.

Loose Change

Banksy

Some things change whilst some things never stay the same. Change can be inevitable. There are things in life that change without your recognition. Change effects us all. It’s a factor in life that cannot be avoided.  However, sometimes change can be an occurrence that you initiate. There are many things in life that you do have the ability to change.  Knowing the right change to make is the tough part. There often seems to be too many options in my life. Surely I should be grateful for this. Surely I should be grateful that I can take control of my life. However, change is also daunting and possesses an element of fear. Security is often something that we want to keep a firm hold of. Leaving a life of security and delving into a life of spontaneity is a huge risk to endure. How handy it would be to be able to see down the path of each option of choice in your life to see where it leads you. The ups and the downs. The good and the bad. All the possibilities that the choice creates for you. Such is life, we cannot do. Therefore, perhaps we should embrace change that we can control, for we often wish to change that which we cannot. 

Stand Still; in Silence

Time. In silence, time still ticks by. You cannot stop time. In stillness, time still ticks by. You cannot stop time. In time, they say it’ll get easier. Who said that? I fear they were wrongly informed. Time; for me, only makes things worse. Memories fade. It becomes apparent that you cannot live in the past forever. The world keeps turning, time keeps ticking. You cannot stop time. There is no time to grieve, often no time to think. Stand still; in silence, experience how it feels to stop. For time cannot do such a thing. You cannot stop time. No matter how still our lives become, how silent your thoughts. Time will pass you by.

Therefore I will waste no time in saying that life is precious. There is no reason enough to stop you from being the person you want to be, doing the things you dream of. I have my ups and I have my downs but deep inside I always know that there is a reason I am here. I have the option to make the most of who I am or to stand still; in silence wishing that I was someone else. I do not have time for shallow people of no substance. I crave to be around people who think past the reflection of a mirror. The eyes are not just an opaque  feature, they are a transparent window into your soul. Your desires, your fears, your past and your future. Do not ignore the eyes. The eyes do not lie; though they can deceive.